Life is a mixture of good and bad moments... If you can express what you are feeling at the moment,trust me, it's really good for your health..but many a times, we need to refrain from expressing...'coz our expressions may bring down someone's morale,sadden someone or may be..to say in simple words hurt someone.. I can't assure that I have never hurt anyone..knowingly-unknowingly I may have,but yeah..that happens only when I am hurt..when I feel low...that time the only friend I look upto is my lappy and my blog..
I am missing home...badly..Home is where maa papa and granny stay..true...but my home was 162 LIG, Barra-2,Single Storey,Kanpur-208027... and I miss it a lot.. some things go away never to come back again..
My home was not a very beautiful one...not a very well maintained one..maa kept it as tidy as possible..papa decorated it with lights on diwali..dadaji used to sit at the gate in the evenings and almost every passer by said "namaste sahab"..I can still see Amma cooking in the kitchen and humming bhajans...I can still see myself coming from school tired and lying down on the bed and dadaji askin"kya baat buchiya..thak gayi? " :(
My home was as old as me..27 years..dadaji had made it after he bought the plot in 1983...the walls..the ceiling..the iron channel..the most unique gate in the entire neighbourhood..plants...earlier we had a parrot...which was an attraction.."hello mithu..good morning mithu.." all the time it used to chant..
I had spent happy,sad,victorious moments in that house..it was that house which welcomed me every time I entered with my report card..when I came back from the hostel..when I came after getting campus placed.. It was that house that seemed to cry when I was leaving for Mumbai...
Yeah my home spoke to me...yeah it really did :( No one liked it as much as I did..But, I was the one who took the initiative to tell dad to sell it.It had actually become necessary..I am bad naa? People who say I am stone hearted,emotionless are right...I get too practical at times..
But..home dear home..I miss you... :( Our new house is bigger than you..they say prettier than you..but i still love you more...and will always do..always...I will never go to that lane...may be I break down :( But I have your snaps...
Everything happens in life for a reason...may be if i had not lost you, my aim to buy a house for maa papa and granny would not have strengthened to such an extent.. It is my primary goal in life now.. you are and will always be an irreplaceable part of my life..most of my user ids are sanchi162...and I am never going to change them..
Love u and miss u hell lots...
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Deadline
Not a new word for most of you...right? "An urgent issue.. to be resolved in next two hours", " This has to be finished today EOD", "Deadline to release this patch is 1 week"... These are the most common statements that you must have heard your supervisor or manager say most of the time. At times I feel that they are like some code themselves in which a function of "Show Alert" is called whenever the client calls them up and asks to finish something :) and the "Show Alert" block comprises methods like "Leaves canceled" "No coffee breaks" "Weekend Working"...so on and so forth....Wow!! so well I know the managerial class of people by now.. 3.2 years of IT experience huh!!
Well, this time my managers gave me a very different kind of deadline...It was actually not a deadline.. it was a "line" which if I crossed, i would be "dead"..simple enough ha? 22nd October 2010... friday..appraisal discussion..my supervisor and my delivery manager called me to the delivery manager's cabin..
Act I Scene 1:
Delivery manager: Lady, you are not performing..
Me: Why sir, what made you think so? I mean, whatever task I have been given till date, I have finished all on or even before time.
Supervisor: I have hardly given you any task.
Me: And may I know the reason please?
Supervisor: Because, i did not have that confidence in you that you will be able to give the desired output.
Me: Can you give it a try?
Delivery Manager(In a rude and insulting tone): Ok, lets give her 2 weeks..if we find her up to the mark, then ok..else I think you should try for big companies...that's where you have come from..and I think that kind of environment suits you..you are not fit for this organization.
Me: ?????????? Totally puzzled....
I mean what?? I am not good at work and I am suitable for big companies?? What was that??I was confused..whether to take is as a compliment or comment..
Well...I took it as a DEADLINE....dear...2 weeks...then you are gone...at such times there are a few people whom i prefer to contact immediately...my best friend Ajay,my Supervisor at my previous "big company" Vivek and my 24*7 help desk Arham...
Act I Scene 2:
I rush home.. Vivek told me about walkin at one of the "big" companies the very next day...that night I studied like a student who forgot his examination date and somehow came to know just a day before the exam... One full book to finish..CV to be edited..print outs needed...tensed, perplexed and determined..I studied.. I told dad about the hell I was in and told him not to tell mom....could not eat..could not sleep..so huge was the fear of being jobless in 2 weeks..
Act II Scene 1: Saturday, 23rd Oct 2010
Well,I am the only player in this scene... Ajay,Vivek,Dad,Bittu Da,Shipra and other morale boosters are working at the back end..Interview at one "big" company.No food no water since morning..I was so damn tensed..I would have puked if i took in anything ..1st round...2nd round...hunger...still waiting...hunger..tension..sleepy..then finally the HR declares that the 3rd and the final round would be telephonic...Relaxed...not because I had cleared 2 rounds..but because I could rush to bhaia's place now and have food!!!!
Act II Scene 2
Monday..Tuesday...days were passing like hell.. I used to sit right next to my supervisor..and he had given me a "Maha faltu" kind of a task to check my ability...I don't know what ability...coding ability or patience ability..All the time I used to wait for the HR's phone call for the last and final round.. Well, it was scheduled on Wednesday..27th Oct 2010..I cleared it!!!yesssssssss!!!!! and within the next two hours i got the job confirmation in that "big" company..It was a verbal confirmation though...I was still waiting for the offer letter.Wednesday went well..Thursday...day by day that guy's attitude towards me was becoming awful..I ran away from office..could not take the insults any more...
Act II Scene 3: 29th Oct 2010
Friday...I messaged him.."I wont be able to come to office..not well enough..please allow me to work from home.." He replied "I am sorry..i am not sure of your productivity..can't allow you to work from home..please apply for leave"... Another good time to have measured the boiling point of blood...Back again to serious studies..there was another walk in the next day at another "big" company..and to be very specific..the fifth largest company of the world...And yeah...I also received the offer letter from the company at which I was given a verbal confirmation two days back..Confidence level increased..
Act III Scene 1: 30th Oct 2010
Immense confidence...interview.. first round..second round..no hunger this time coz I had had a packet of maggi as breakfast..third round.."Congratulations..you are through..will soon give you a call for salary negotiation.." Party time!!!!! I had already drafted my resignation while my blood was boiling the previous day and it showed very well in the mail... Came home..opened my mailbox/drafts and clicked the "send" button with pride...
This is how it happens my dear friends...you must have heard your managers saying.."Be proactive"...This was proactiveness...I was asked to look for 1 job in 2 weeks...and keeping in mind my manager's words "Probably you are meant to work in "big" companies"...I managed to get myself 2 jobs in 1 week...
Happy...content..and confident!!!!! Happy diwali..
Well, this time my managers gave me a very different kind of deadline...It was actually not a deadline.. it was a "line" which if I crossed, i would be "dead"..simple enough ha? 22nd October 2010... friday..appraisal discussion..my supervisor and my delivery manager called me to the delivery manager's cabin..
Act I Scene 1:
Delivery manager: Lady, you are not performing..
Me: Why sir, what made you think so? I mean, whatever task I have been given till date, I have finished all on or even before time.
Supervisor: I have hardly given you any task.
Me: And may I know the reason please?
Supervisor: Because, i did not have that confidence in you that you will be able to give the desired output.
Me: Can you give it a try?
Delivery Manager(In a rude and insulting tone): Ok, lets give her 2 weeks..if we find her up to the mark, then ok..else I think you should try for big companies...that's where you have come from..and I think that kind of environment suits you..you are not fit for this organization.
Me: ?????????? Totally puzzled....
I mean what?? I am not good at work and I am suitable for big companies?? What was that??I was confused..whether to take is as a compliment or comment..
Well...I took it as a DEADLINE....dear...2 weeks...then you are gone...at such times there are a few people whom i prefer to contact immediately...my best friend Ajay,my Supervisor at my previous "big company" Vivek and my 24*7 help desk Arham...
Act I Scene 2:
I rush home.. Vivek told me about walkin at one of the "big" companies the very next day...that night I studied like a student who forgot his examination date and somehow came to know just a day before the exam... One full book to finish..CV to be edited..print outs needed...tensed, perplexed and determined..I studied.. I told dad about the hell I was in and told him not to tell mom....could not eat..could not sleep..so huge was the fear of being jobless in 2 weeks..
Act II Scene 1: Saturday, 23rd Oct 2010
Well,I am the only player in this scene... Ajay,Vivek,Dad,Bittu Da,Shipra and other morale boosters are working at the back end..Interview at one "big" company.No food no water since morning..I was so damn tensed..I would have puked if i took in anything ..1st round...2nd round...hunger...still waiting...hunger..tension..sleepy..then finally the HR declares that the 3rd and the final round would be telephonic...Relaxed...not because I had cleared 2 rounds..but because I could rush to bhaia's place now and have food!!!!
Act II Scene 2
Monday..Tuesday...days were passing like hell.. I used to sit right next to my supervisor..and he had given me a "Maha faltu" kind of a task to check my ability...I don't know what ability...coding ability or patience ability..All the time I used to wait for the HR's phone call for the last and final round.. Well, it was scheduled on Wednesday..27th Oct 2010..I cleared it!!!yesssssssss!!!!! and within the next two hours i got the job confirmation in that "big" company..It was a verbal confirmation though...I was still waiting for the offer letter.Wednesday went well..Thursday...day by day that guy's attitude towards me was becoming awful..I ran away from office..could not take the insults any more...
Act II Scene 3: 29th Oct 2010
Friday...I messaged him.."I wont be able to come to office..not well enough..please allow me to work from home.." He replied "I am sorry..i am not sure of your productivity..can't allow you to work from home..please apply for leave"... Another good time to have measured the boiling point of blood...Back again to serious studies..there was another walk in the next day at another "big" company..and to be very specific..the fifth largest company of the world...And yeah...I also received the offer letter from the company at which I was given a verbal confirmation two days back..Confidence level increased..
Act III Scene 1: 30th Oct 2010
Immense confidence...interview.. first round..second round..no hunger this time coz I had had a packet of maggi as breakfast..third round.."Congratulations..you are through..will soon give you a call for salary negotiation.." Party time!!!!! I had already drafted my resignation while my blood was boiling the previous day and it showed very well in the mail... Came home..opened my mailbox/drafts and clicked the "send" button with pride...
This is how it happens my dear friends...you must have heard your managers saying.."Be proactive"...This was proactiveness...I was asked to look for 1 job in 2 weeks...and keeping in mind my manager's words "Probably you are meant to work in "big" companies"...I managed to get myself 2 jobs in 1 week...
Happy...content..and confident!!!!! Happy diwali..
Friday, September 17, 2010
Sandels..
It was not long since they had shifted in the flat next to ours..Mrs and Mr Das with their little daughter Anjali. Anjali was like a little angel. I used to see her walk to the sea beach with her dad and play there for hours together in the shallow water at the juhu beach..She was like I was in my childhood days..
Frankly she told me that she feared to go further in the water coz she feared the waves.Mrs. Das once told me that when Anjali was a toddler she used to step down so carefully from the bed,she kept observing her feet till it touched the ground..Never had she fallen of the bed.Never had she fallen while learning cycling..such a cautious,sweet lil darling she was..long hair,chubby cheeks and a soothing smile...
It was her seventh birthday,when she asked me for a playing kit. The playing kit comprised spades,sand diggers,small buckets and all such stuffs which are used to make sand castles at sea beaches. And she had asked her mom for the beautiful pink sandels which she had seen in the nearby footwear shop. Those pink sandels would go perfectly with her pink dress which she was planning to wear for her birthday in school.
We went shopping together,Mrs.Das, Anjali and myself..Had a great day.Had loads of fun.Shopping,eating enjoying ourselves we spent the whole day out.We were happy,but may be destiny was not....
We came out of the mall with the shopping bags in our hands.Lil Anjali thought she is going to be a big girl soon and hence did not need her mumma's hand to cross the road..She ran..and we screamed..It was all in a fraction of seconds..A reckless car driver just thrashed her on the road and zooooom went the tyres over her legs..
Crowd,blood,ambulance,panic..we rushed to the hospital. Mr.Das had come by that time.Their daughter was in pain..immense pain..no one more than the parents could feel it.I consoled them as much as I could,but I loved Anjali too...loved her a lot..hence could not keep myself strong for long.
The doctor came and announced.."The child has gained consciousness,but I am sorry,we need to operate the leg.She won't be able to walk on her feet anymore". Gloom!!!!!! Despair!!!! Mrs.Das fainted there.Anjali's dad had eyes filled with tears.We went inside the room.Anjali lay there..calm..little knowing about her future.Her papa took her in her arms..She smiled at us.She asked her mom for the packet of sandles.Mr.Das was taking her to the operation theater..She had the bag of sandels in her hand..the packet fell down..and Anjali shouted "My Sandels.......!!!!".
I bent and picked them up,gave them in her hands and she smiled back..I wondered..what would she be missing more? Her foot or the pink sandels?
Frankly she told me that she feared to go further in the water coz she feared the waves.Mrs. Das once told me that when Anjali was a toddler she used to step down so carefully from the bed,she kept observing her feet till it touched the ground..Never had she fallen of the bed.Never had she fallen while learning cycling..such a cautious,sweet lil darling she was..long hair,chubby cheeks and a soothing smile...
It was her seventh birthday,when she asked me for a playing kit. The playing kit comprised spades,sand diggers,small buckets and all such stuffs which are used to make sand castles at sea beaches. And she had asked her mom for the beautiful pink sandels which she had seen in the nearby footwear shop. Those pink sandels would go perfectly with her pink dress which she was planning to wear for her birthday in school.
We went shopping together,Mrs.Das, Anjali and myself..Had a great day.Had loads of fun.Shopping,eating enjoying ourselves we spent the whole day out.We were happy,but may be destiny was not....
We came out of the mall with the shopping bags in our hands.Lil Anjali thought she is going to be a big girl soon and hence did not need her mumma's hand to cross the road..She ran..and we screamed..It was all in a fraction of seconds..A reckless car driver just thrashed her on the road and zooooom went the tyres over her legs..
Crowd,blood,ambulance,panic..we rushed to the hospital. Mr.Das had come by that time.Their daughter was in pain..immense pain..no one more than the parents could feel it.I consoled them as much as I could,but I loved Anjali too...loved her a lot..hence could not keep myself strong for long.
The doctor came and announced.."The child has gained consciousness,but I am sorry,we need to operate the leg.She won't be able to walk on her feet anymore". Gloom!!!!!! Despair!!!! Mrs.Das fainted there.Anjali's dad had eyes filled with tears.We went inside the room.Anjali lay there..calm..little knowing about her future.Her papa took her in her arms..She smiled at us.She asked her mom for the packet of sandles.Mr.Das was taking her to the operation theater..She had the bag of sandels in her hand..the packet fell down..and Anjali shouted "My Sandels.......!!!!".
I bent and picked them up,gave them in her hands and she smiled back..I wondered..what would she be missing more? Her foot or the pink sandels?
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Mixed Bag....
Writing after a long time..last 10 days were pathetic..Met with a serious accident in which my left leg was badly damaged..Well, I am recovering now..almost recovered...only the stiffness in the leg still remains..it was bandaged since the past ten days..so the doc says that blood circulation would take some time to get back to normal..My friends were a great support.
I and Shipra were going to a nearby mall for a movie when the auto rickshaw tuppled..tuppled at 90 degrees straight on the uneven road.I fell on the ground and the rick fell over me...Thanks to Ajay and Ankur for their timely help..Shipra would not have been able to manage all alone..but she also cared a lot at home...damn it I had vomited on her bedsheet...which she cleaned!!yukkkks!!!! Hey shipra...thanks yaar :( I needed full bedrest,so mumma had to come over...poor lady...coming all over from Kanpur to Mumbai to take care of me..Its rightly said "God can not be present eveverywhere,so he made mothers"... Love you mom..love you a lot..Wounds had started healing,when yester-evening I came to know about Ajay's accident..why does it always have to happen this way?? Any ill happening to me has to happen to him..that too with more severity..he got 5 stiches on the chin!!! My God!! His skin is sooo sensitive...blood oozes out even if he scratches hard..and 5 stiches!!!!!!!It must have been pathetic..No one to take care of him and he acts "Mr. Brave" as if nothing has happened..Am feeling so low since yesternight...
Well,came to office today...hoping that will be working for 5-6 hours a day and then leave for home..My leaves are all exhausted..and fit and fine I am..no other problem other that a bit swollen leg..It would have been so silly to sit at home uselessly...but.......nothing goes smooth... My delivery manager says..."either you stay at home and rest or you come and work for full 9 hours!!!" Phew!!!
So, I am carrying a mixed bag of emotions...
1) Proud of myself..for being a good and brave girl and recovering so soon
2) Obliged towards my family and friends(especially Ajay,Ankur and Shipra)
3) Happy coz no more yukkks medicines and turmeric wala milk
4) Damn damn sad for my best friend Ajay...hey...get well soon yaar :(
5) Angry....very very angry for the silly IT rules...even if you have no work...come and sit in office for 9 hours or stay at home for no reason and get your salary deducted..There is no midway out!!
I and Shipra were going to a nearby mall for a movie when the auto rickshaw tuppled..tuppled at 90 degrees straight on the uneven road.I fell on the ground and the rick fell over me...Thanks to Ajay and Ankur for their timely help..Shipra would not have been able to manage all alone..but she also cared a lot at home...damn it I had vomited on her bedsheet...which she cleaned!!yukkkks!!!! Hey shipra...thanks yaar :( I needed full bedrest,so mumma had to come over...poor lady...coming all over from Kanpur to Mumbai to take care of me..Its rightly said "God can not be present eveverywhere,so he made mothers"... Love you mom..love you a lot..Wounds had started healing,when yester-evening I came to know about Ajay's accident..why does it always have to happen this way?? Any ill happening to me has to happen to him..that too with more severity..he got 5 stiches on the chin!!! My God!! His skin is sooo sensitive...blood oozes out even if he scratches hard..and 5 stiches!!!!!!!It must have been pathetic..No one to take care of him and he acts "Mr. Brave" as if nothing has happened..Am feeling so low since yesternight...
Well,came to office today...hoping that will be working for 5-6 hours a day and then leave for home..My leaves are all exhausted..and fit and fine I am..no other problem other that a bit swollen leg..It would have been so silly to sit at home uselessly...but.......nothing goes smooth... My delivery manager says..."either you stay at home and rest or you come and work for full 9 hours!!!" Phew!!!
So, I am carrying a mixed bag of emotions...
1) Proud of myself..for being a good and brave girl and recovering so soon
2) Obliged towards my family and friends(especially Ajay,Ankur and Shipra)
3) Happy coz no more yukkks medicines and turmeric wala milk
4) Damn damn sad for my best friend Ajay...hey...get well soon yaar :(
5) Angry....very very angry for the silly IT rules...even if you have no work...come and sit in office for 9 hours or stay at home for no reason and get your salary deducted..There is no midway out!!
Thursday, August 19, 2010
It's for you my friend..
Hello everyone,
Writing after a long time I suppose....well,whenever I write I am at the brim of my emotions..sad,happy..whatever..Today I am carrying a mixed bag...I am sad,because I lost something forever and I am happy because I learnt something forever..And always remember one thing..people come into your life,people go..but your learnings and experiences are something which will remain with you lifelong..More you learn,the better person you become...Well,enough of "gyaan" :)
Many of you must have seen "Toy Story-3"..Its about a child who had his toys,those toys were his best friends,and now when he grew up,he had to abandon those toys and give them away to someone else....ooooooo..tough..yes indeed very very tough!!! For a girl like me who is possesive even about her chocolate wrappers(you may be knowing about this if you have read my testimonial on orkut written by one of my uncles),it's very very tough to give away something precious to a person whom I don't even know..never even seen....well,I did that today....Yess..I finally did it..I gave away my most precious toy to someone who needed it more than me..I had enjoyed my share of moments of playing with that toy of mine...now,it's some other child's turn to enjoy..and its high time for Miss Sanchaita Sarkar to grow up :)
My tag line on skype is "My mind tells me to give up..but my heart won't allow.." and a colleague once sent a mail saying "Whenever there is confusion between which is correct..mind or heart...just judge...what are you better at". I asked him,how do I know that? He asked me "how were you at studies?" I replied.."I was pretty good".then he asked "Have you ever done some big kind of daan or something.." I said "Nooooooo"....he concluded,"Then you are good at your mind.. " :) Hey Sharad,I did a big daan today yaar....now what..now you tell me whether I have a good mind or a good heart :)
After finally deciding that yeah..this toy is now getting bored with me,it needs a new child who can play with it..i felt so sad for the toy..I had tortured it so much..the little toy seemed to smile after long long time..yeah,it must be sad for leaving me(I mean I am not very sure :),they had so shown in the movie that the toys were sad to leave the child..so I concluded..haha :) ).
Now comes in the final hero of the story.....I did a great job by giving away the toy...but the motivation behind it was Ajay...my best friend Ajay...he taught me "If any action done by you can bring a smile on someone else's face,even if it fetches tears to your eyes..do it." I did it Ajay,I did it..many faces are lightened up today...many..yes there are tears in my eyes ofcourse..but the world seems to be glittering in those tears..Thanks,for teaching me such a nice lesson..I will always remember it "Khud ke liye jeeye to kya jeeye...kabhi auro ke liye bhi jee ke dekho".It's an amazing feeling...I feel I have lost a lot..but I have gained a lot as well.So,a million dollar thanks to you my dear friend..for everything..you are the best friend,philosopher and guide I could ever get.. Yeah,I am a bit lazy at maintaining contacts..but I remember everyone in my heart..You will soon be married and I tell you,married life is a hell busy one..(hehe..speaking as if I am so experienced)..but yeah,its a fact..it is indeed tough to maintain contacts with all friends at a later stage in life...I may not even be able to attend your marriage..but this post which is especially dedicated to you goes as your wedding gift..(saste mein nipat gayi naa...hehehe)....but,you know the cost right..? Not so sasta..Lemme know how you liked my gift..
And for all my friends out there,if you want a similar wedding gift..don't just sit there like couch potatoes..teach me something,add to my personality...may be there will be a post for you as well :)Till date,Ajay deserved one :)Not to forget mentioning names of few friends who had been with me in the toughest of my times.thanks Ankur,thanks Manju,thanks Shipra,thanks Chunu,thanks Arham,thanks Ashish,thanks A1 and A2 bhaia and thanks Gautam...(milega milega tum sab ko bhi milega gift)
Good luck Ajay....and wish you a very happy married life..God bless!!!
PS:- A request to all those who leave comments on this blog..I want all of you to wish my friend on this auspicious occassion..this would add on to my gift :) And for you Ajay...you lazy lump..you got to thank each of them in turn..naak mat katana meri..samajh mein aaya :)
Bbye..........
Writing after a long time I suppose....well,whenever I write I am at the brim of my emotions..sad,happy..whatever..Today I am carrying a mixed bag...I am sad,because I lost something forever and I am happy because I learnt something forever..And always remember one thing..people come into your life,people go..but your learnings and experiences are something which will remain with you lifelong..More you learn,the better person you become...Well,enough of "gyaan" :)
Many of you must have seen "Toy Story-3"..Its about a child who had his toys,those toys were his best friends,and now when he grew up,he had to abandon those toys and give them away to someone else....ooooooo..tough..yes indeed very very tough!!! For a girl like me who is possesive even about her chocolate wrappers(you may be knowing about this if you have read my testimonial on orkut written by one of my uncles),it's very very tough to give away something precious to a person whom I don't even know..never even seen....well,I did that today....Yess..I finally did it..I gave away my most precious toy to someone who needed it more than me..I had enjoyed my share of moments of playing with that toy of mine...now,it's some other child's turn to enjoy..and its high time for Miss Sanchaita Sarkar to grow up :)
My tag line on skype is "My mind tells me to give up..but my heart won't allow.." and a colleague once sent a mail saying "Whenever there is confusion between which is correct..mind or heart...just judge...what are you better at". I asked him,how do I know that? He asked me "how were you at studies?" I replied.."I was pretty good".then he asked "Have you ever done some big kind of daan or something.." I said "Nooooooo"....he concluded,"Then you are good at your mind.. " :) Hey Sharad,I did a big daan today yaar....now what..now you tell me whether I have a good mind or a good heart :)
After finally deciding that yeah..this toy is now getting bored with me,it needs a new child who can play with it..i felt so sad for the toy..I had tortured it so much..the little toy seemed to smile after long long time..yeah,it must be sad for leaving me(I mean I am not very sure :),they had so shown in the movie that the toys were sad to leave the child..so I concluded..haha :) ).
Now comes in the final hero of the story.....I did a great job by giving away the toy...but the motivation behind it was Ajay...my best friend Ajay...he taught me "If any action done by you can bring a smile on someone else's face,even if it fetches tears to your eyes..do it." I did it Ajay,I did it..many faces are lightened up today...many..yes there are tears in my eyes ofcourse..but the world seems to be glittering in those tears..Thanks,for teaching me such a nice lesson..I will always remember it "Khud ke liye jeeye to kya jeeye...kabhi auro ke liye bhi jee ke dekho".It's an amazing feeling...I feel I have lost a lot..but I have gained a lot as well.So,a million dollar thanks to you my dear friend..for everything..you are the best friend,philosopher and guide I could ever get.. Yeah,I am a bit lazy at maintaining contacts..but I remember everyone in my heart..You will soon be married and I tell you,married life is a hell busy one..(hehe..speaking as if I am so experienced)..but yeah,its a fact..it is indeed tough to maintain contacts with all friends at a later stage in life...I may not even be able to attend your marriage..but this post which is especially dedicated to you goes as your wedding gift..(saste mein nipat gayi naa...hehehe)....but,you know the cost right..? Not so sasta..Lemme know how you liked my gift..
And for all my friends out there,if you want a similar wedding gift..don't just sit there like couch potatoes..teach me something,add to my personality...may be there will be a post for you as well :)Till date,Ajay deserved one :)Not to forget mentioning names of few friends who had been with me in the toughest of my times.thanks Ankur,thanks Manju,thanks Shipra,thanks Chunu,thanks Arham,thanks Ashish,thanks A1 and A2 bhaia and thanks Gautam...(milega milega tum sab ko bhi milega gift)
Good luck Ajay....and wish you a very happy married life..God bless!!!
PS:- A request to all those who leave comments on this blog..I want all of you to wish my friend on this auspicious occassion..this would add on to my gift :) And for you Ajay...you lazy lump..you got to thank each of them in turn..naak mat katana meri..samajh mein aaya :)
Bbye..........
Monday, August 16, 2010
To be or not to be........
To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause: there's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscover'd country from whose bourn
No traveller returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action. - Soft you now!
The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my sins remember'd.
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause: there's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscover'd country from whose bourn
No traveller returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action. - Soft you now!
The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my sins remember'd.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Here I am
Hello....
Not much of work today..infact,frankly speaking no work today ;) Came to office at 12:40 pm...which is around 40 minutes late than usual...and as of now no work at all...I hate online studying...So, I am waiting for 2:30 pm...so that I can go out for lunch..and as far as work is concerned..I will be receiving a file at 11:20 am EST..which makes it around 8:45 pm IST..I have to work upon that..till then simply no work today...
How did I land here? Interesting story to be narrated..It's 2:07 pm and I have to wind up by 2:30 pm..I don't wanna make Shipra wait for lunch and I don't like to leave drafted blogs..once I begin to write..I end up by pressing the "publish post" button..So, here I begin...
It all began in March 2006....I was enjoying a nice evening nap in my hostel room...when someone came in "Hey...get up..Satyam is coming for a placement pool..we need to go to Allahabad tomorrow.." What rubbish!! never had any company come for our seniors,why would they come for us...rumour spreaders all around!! But,to be true...it left me with a thought "Sacchi aa rahi hai kya? ;)" All 4 of us..Garima,Shipra,Savita and myself got up reluctantly...somebody told.."Satyam's written comprises puzzles". And woooooo..you could see everyone in the hostel with a "Shakuntala Devi puzzle book" in their hands...I went,washed my face...by then Shipra and Savita had seriously started off...It was very boring...seriously very boring...I went to another friend's room and began to frame the Curriculum Vitaes for all four of us...Seriously..four of us had same CVs..we had same objectives,same skills and same hobbies!! :)
We went to Allahabad...all companies used to come to one of the colleges there "United College Of Engineering and Research"...Well,people appeared for the written..people passed..people failed...as for me and Garima...our luck failed..The hall tickets(kind of admit card)that we were given was fake!!Our entire IT Branch had got fake hall tickets..so we could not appear for the test..Wow!! thank God I didn't study those puzzles ;).When other students were waiting for their interview results to be declared, the unlucky(or may be lucky) bunch of IT students from Northern India Engineering College were enjoying the cool Ganges breezes at the Naini Bridge...beautiful it was...Ahh!! I am getting nostalgic!! Well...we came back...some of our batch mates were placed...to be true..yes..I felt bad when I saw some less deserving people with a job in their pockets...so the strive had begun now...
Next HCL Technologies came in...Uffffffff!! Such a tough written test they had set up...obviously I could not pass..no regrets whatsoever...
Then came in Syntel...I tell you,that was the best question paper I had ever seen...all full of silly mathematical questions and easy vocabulary...I did well..but.......Syntel had to select only 3 students among I don't know how many thousands...again a trip to the Naini bridge and then back to Lucknow...
The world was seeming to be a dark room filled with despair..Some more of our batchmates had been placed by now and comments like "Ho jaega...dont worry..kismat hai.."etc etc had started to pour in..It's actually pathetic when people come to you with basket full of sympathies...
Then came Birla Soft..another tough paper...I wont be able to solve it even if it's given to me now..what minute details of RDBMS and OS and what not!! Well,Siddhartha qualified the written..and as for me,Garima and Shipra..we concluded "Hamari job kabhi nai lag sakti.." Given up!! Savita did that long back :)
Soon came in the news...Infy is coming...I requested these two to try luck once..one last time..we went like brave soldiers.....bad experience again...Now,I gave up.."I will never go in for any company...finish!!!!!!" I am a good for nothing...
Then...7th July 2006..I-flex came in...I had decided not to go..I was resting at home..enjoying the semester break...even mom dad had given up..they are always like that..joyous in my happiness and doomed in my despair..love you mom dad!! A friend called up..."Chalo na ghoom ke aate hain Allahabad..please.." Reluctantly,I went..appeared for the test..had not studied a single word after the Syntel experience(no doubt the Birla Soft paper seemed tough ;))..well I qualified the written test...8th of July 2006 was supposed to be the day for the interviews..Morale had boosted up by now.."If I clear the technical...no ways will I fail in the HR". Yeah..my friends used to call me "Confidence ki tokri"..So,technical,HR all cleared..and I was holding the offer letter of I-flex Solutions Ltd. in my hands by 9:00 pm on 8th of July 2006...First time I came from Allahabad "non empty handed"......
Final year of college was better now...got a chance to enjoy more..lesser worries..had a job in hand...Joined I-flex on 13th August 2007...must say,I enjoyed and learned a lot...had a nice time,met some of the best people of my life there...but.....after 2.8 years..I began to get bored..with what? work? Nahh..with the salary!!!!!!
Then began another phase..naukri.com,monsterjob.com etc etc...TCS was my first experience..they needed testers..I was a developer...doomed!!
Then came a "growing company"...I went to their teenie-meenie office..and after looking at my profile they said "Sorry Ma'm we can not afford you."Oh wow!!!I deserved a pat on the back ;)
Then Syntel again....didn't make for it...then Cognizant..was not eligible for it...then one fine day.....when my blood had almost reached the boiling point..I had just reached home after a tiring day at office...my cell buzzed..."Hi,this is Immaculate from Indus Valley Partners". Frankly speaking,I was so tired that neither did I get the lady's name nor the company's :) Well..went through a couple of rounds of interview...and here I am.......Going for lunch..
Bbye...take care..
Not much of work today..infact,frankly speaking no work today ;) Came to office at 12:40 pm...which is around 40 minutes late than usual...and as of now no work at all...I hate online studying...So, I am waiting for 2:30 pm...so that I can go out for lunch..and as far as work is concerned..I will be receiving a file at 11:20 am EST..which makes it around 8:45 pm IST..I have to work upon that..till then simply no work today...
How did I land here? Interesting story to be narrated..It's 2:07 pm and I have to wind up by 2:30 pm..I don't wanna make Shipra wait for lunch and I don't like to leave drafted blogs..once I begin to write..I end up by pressing the "publish post" button..So, here I begin...
It all began in March 2006....I was enjoying a nice evening nap in my hostel room...when someone came in "Hey...get up..Satyam is coming for a placement pool..we need to go to Allahabad tomorrow.." What rubbish!! never had any company come for our seniors,why would they come for us...rumour spreaders all around!! But,to be true...it left me with a thought "Sacchi aa rahi hai kya? ;)" All 4 of us..Garima,Shipra,Savita and myself got up reluctantly...somebody told.."Satyam's written comprises puzzles". And woooooo..you could see everyone in the hostel with a "Shakuntala Devi puzzle book" in their hands...I went,washed my face...by then Shipra and Savita had seriously started off...It was very boring...seriously very boring...I went to another friend's room and began to frame the Curriculum Vitaes for all four of us...Seriously..four of us had same CVs..we had same objectives,same skills and same hobbies!! :)
We went to Allahabad...all companies used to come to one of the colleges there "United College Of Engineering and Research"...Well,people appeared for the written..people passed..people failed...as for me and Garima...our luck failed..The hall tickets(kind of admit card)that we were given was fake!!Our entire IT Branch had got fake hall tickets..so we could not appear for the test..Wow!! thank God I didn't study those puzzles ;).When other students were waiting for their interview results to be declared, the unlucky(or may be lucky) bunch of IT students from Northern India Engineering College were enjoying the cool Ganges breezes at the Naini Bridge...beautiful it was...Ahh!! I am getting nostalgic!! Well...we came back...some of our batch mates were placed...to be true..yes..I felt bad when I saw some less deserving people with a job in their pockets...so the strive had begun now...
Next HCL Technologies came in...Uffffffff!! Such a tough written test they had set up...obviously I could not pass..no regrets whatsoever...
Then came in Syntel...I tell you,that was the best question paper I had ever seen...all full of silly mathematical questions and easy vocabulary...I did well..but.......Syntel had to select only 3 students among I don't know how many thousands...again a trip to the Naini bridge and then back to Lucknow...
The world was seeming to be a dark room filled with despair..Some more of our batchmates had been placed by now and comments like "Ho jaega...dont worry..kismat hai.."etc etc had started to pour in..It's actually pathetic when people come to you with basket full of sympathies...
Then came Birla Soft..another tough paper...I wont be able to solve it even if it's given to me now..what minute details of RDBMS and OS and what not!! Well,Siddhartha qualified the written..and as for me,Garima and Shipra..we concluded "Hamari job kabhi nai lag sakti.." Given up!! Savita did that long back :)
Soon came in the news...Infy is coming...I requested these two to try luck once..one last time..we went like brave soldiers.....bad experience again...Now,I gave up.."I will never go in for any company...finish!!!!!!" I am a good for nothing...
Then...7th July 2006..I-flex came in...I had decided not to go..I was resting at home..enjoying the semester break...even mom dad had given up..they are always like that..joyous in my happiness and doomed in my despair..love you mom dad!! A friend called up..."Chalo na ghoom ke aate hain Allahabad..please.." Reluctantly,I went..appeared for the test..had not studied a single word after the Syntel experience(no doubt the Birla Soft paper seemed tough ;))..well I qualified the written test...8th of July 2006 was supposed to be the day for the interviews..Morale had boosted up by now.."If I clear the technical...no ways will I fail in the HR". Yeah..my friends used to call me "Confidence ki tokri"..So,technical,HR all cleared..and I was holding the offer letter of I-flex Solutions Ltd. in my hands by 9:00 pm on 8th of July 2006...First time I came from Allahabad "non empty handed"......
Final year of college was better now...got a chance to enjoy more..lesser worries..had a job in hand...Joined I-flex on 13th August 2007...must say,I enjoyed and learned a lot...had a nice time,met some of the best people of my life there...but.....after 2.8 years..I began to get bored..with what? work? Nahh..with the salary!!!!!!
Then began another phase..naukri.com,monsterjob.com etc etc...TCS was my first experience..they needed testers..I was a developer...doomed!!
Then came a "growing company"...I went to their teenie-meenie office..and after looking at my profile they said "Sorry Ma'm we can not afford you."Oh wow!!!I deserved a pat on the back ;)
Then Syntel again....didn't make for it...then Cognizant..was not eligible for it...then one fine day.....when my blood had almost reached the boiling point..I had just reached home after a tiring day at office...my cell buzzed..."Hi,this is Immaculate from Indus Valley Partners". Frankly speaking,I was so tired that neither did I get the lady's name nor the company's :) Well..went through a couple of rounds of interview...and here I am.......Going for lunch..
Bbye...take care..
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
The cat and the rabbit
Let me narrate to you a short story..Well, I don't promise it would be short one, because I often end up writing long write-ups..so my readers are requested to bear up:)
In the beautiful meadows there lived two friends...a kitten and a baby rabbit..They were the best of friends..innocent,understanding,with a heart brimming with love and care for each other..The rabbit was often threatened by his clan to keep himself away from the clever kitten..They thought that the kitten might harm their baby when she grew up into a cat..The rabbit did get frightened at times,but he trusted his cute kitty.Never even in her dreams could she imagine of causing any harm to her mate..this the rabbit knew well..They grew up spending happy jolly days together..bonded with love..they were always there with each other.Time went by..they grew up..a white rabbit with shallow pink eyes...a cute white spotless cat..the rabbit was quiet..the cat was chirpy..the rabbit was shy..the cat was brave..the rabbit was wise and the cat trusted his wisdom..the cat was naive and the rabbit trusted her innocence..They were incomplete without each other..they were complimentary to each other..
One sad and gloomy day the rabbit's mother died...for the very first time the cat saw tears in her friend's eyes.She understood that she could no longer afford to be kiddish..she had to be a friend as well as a loving and caring mom at times..The rabbit was in despair..he loved his mom like any other kid does..he was quiet..he wrapped himself with more silence...
The cat saw him through all these phases in life..and she understood in her heart..that her friend has lost so much..such a big loss...she had to be the best friend ever and give him all the love of the universe.
Finally the rabbit's clan decided to separate them for ever...Ages back they had had bad experiences with the cats..so they thought that cats are not good to be made friends with... :(
The rabbit pleaded..tried his best to convince that his friend was sooo good to him..she had such a nice heart..but there was no one to listen...The rabbit's family took him away with them to a different place..away from the cat..they were never meant to see each other again :(
The cat roamed about lonely in the places where she used to wander about with her best friend..Days turned into months,months to years..and they never met again...Destiny had separated them from each other.. :(
Now, my dear friends....tell me frankly how many of you related the cat and the rabbit to yourself and some dear friend whom you lost forever?And be true..you must have kept yourself in the place of the kitten..right?The one whose friend left her and went away...My dear friends..there is a famous saying in hindi "Dunia mein bahut gham hai..apna gham fir bhi kam hai".
The cat is sad...thats one part of the story..but did anyone care to think about the rabbit?Neither did his clan nor did you..all your sympathies went with the cat...right?
Try to look at the other side of the story..what happened to the rabbit?His clan did not care about him...separated him from his best buddy and thereafter till he lived,he had to live without his friend whom he loved equally..the cat could sit by her mom and tell how much she missed the rabbit..but to whom would the rabbit talk?
So,my dear friends...if ever you find yourself to be the cat...don't forget that wherever your rabbit is...he/she misses you equally..perhaps much more..rather than cursing destiny to have separated you,pray to God for your best buddy's happiness...Love and care have no bounds..no limits...let your love flow in the air and reach to your rabbit..He needs it more than you do...
In the beautiful meadows there lived two friends...a kitten and a baby rabbit..They were the best of friends..innocent,understanding,with a heart brimming with love and care for each other..The rabbit was often threatened by his clan to keep himself away from the clever kitten..They thought that the kitten might harm their baby when she grew up into a cat..The rabbit did get frightened at times,but he trusted his cute kitty.Never even in her dreams could she imagine of causing any harm to her mate..this the rabbit knew well..They grew up spending happy jolly days together..bonded with love..they were always there with each other.Time went by..they grew up..a white rabbit with shallow pink eyes...a cute white spotless cat..the rabbit was quiet..the cat was chirpy..the rabbit was shy..the cat was brave..the rabbit was wise and the cat trusted his wisdom..the cat was naive and the rabbit trusted her innocence..They were incomplete without each other..they were complimentary to each other..
One sad and gloomy day the rabbit's mother died...for the very first time the cat saw tears in her friend's eyes.She understood that she could no longer afford to be kiddish..she had to be a friend as well as a loving and caring mom at times..The rabbit was in despair..he loved his mom like any other kid does..he was quiet..he wrapped himself with more silence...
The cat saw him through all these phases in life..and she understood in her heart..that her friend has lost so much..such a big loss...she had to be the best friend ever and give him all the love of the universe.
Finally the rabbit's clan decided to separate them for ever...Ages back they had had bad experiences with the cats..so they thought that cats are not good to be made friends with... :(
The rabbit pleaded..tried his best to convince that his friend was sooo good to him..she had such a nice heart..but there was no one to listen...The rabbit's family took him away with them to a different place..away from the cat..they were never meant to see each other again :(
The cat roamed about lonely in the places where she used to wander about with her best friend..Days turned into months,months to years..and they never met again...Destiny had separated them from each other.. :(
Now, my dear friends....tell me frankly how many of you related the cat and the rabbit to yourself and some dear friend whom you lost forever?And be true..you must have kept yourself in the place of the kitten..right?The one whose friend left her and went away...My dear friends..there is a famous saying in hindi "Dunia mein bahut gham hai..apna gham fir bhi kam hai".
The cat is sad...thats one part of the story..but did anyone care to think about the rabbit?Neither did his clan nor did you..all your sympathies went with the cat...right?
Try to look at the other side of the story..what happened to the rabbit?His clan did not care about him...separated him from his best buddy and thereafter till he lived,he had to live without his friend whom he loved equally..the cat could sit by her mom and tell how much she missed the rabbit..but to whom would the rabbit talk?
So,my dear friends...if ever you find yourself to be the cat...don't forget that wherever your rabbit is...he/she misses you equally..perhaps much more..rather than cursing destiny to have separated you,pray to God for your best buddy's happiness...Love and care have no bounds..no limits...let your love flow in the air and reach to your rabbit..He needs it more than you do...
Monday, July 26, 2010
Don't let anyone feel bad..
Its often true.."Howsoever tough times you face today..you shall always have a beautiful memory of it tomorrow"...
My heart goes back to somewhere around 1995...I will narrate to you a small incidence of my life.I was a student of the seventh standard at that time.I studied in St. Mary's Convent Kanpur.One fine day,it was declared in school that the buses won't be running today...some strike due to diesel rates increase and all!!(Yeah...it always happens..and general public suffers.. :)). Now,my school was some good distance away from home.It used to take me approximately an hour and a half by bus to reach school...No mobile phones in those days..No landline even at my place..and yeah, I was not a pocket money kid ;)Now the question was..How do I reach home? School ended at 1:30 pm...We all rushed out of the gates..I was an extreme introvert kind of a child..As of now, I think I should have consulted my bus mates as to how were they planning to go..and I should have joined them...But no...something extra ordinary had to happen that day..
I moved on..and yes..I should not forget to mention,I took along a class one kid with me as well..why?? Just beccause her grandpa and my grandpa were good friends..What would his grandpa think of me no...if I left that kid alone..So...no money..an extra person along..nervous..frightened I moved on..........
I knew the way home..and the means of transport required as well..School to Bada Chauraha via rickshaw..20 bucks..bada chauraha to gumti by shared tempo..5 bucks..gumti to govind nagar by tempo again...3 bucks..govind nagar to home by rickshaw...5 bucks..Hmmm...so it comes to 33 bucks..and yes,don't forget to double the sum for that grandpa's grand daughter I was carrying along!! Morals do crush your common sense at times!! It often happens with me.."How will he/she feel?" "Why should I hurt him/her?" These thoughts are like parachutes..they open up when you are in the air heading towards nowhere...
Well...back to 1995...I hired a rickshaw.."Bhaia...bada chauraha chalenge?" "Haan chalenge..bees rupaya lagega"...Confidently I boarded along with my bag,water bottle and Harshita..yes..that was her name...As we reached bada chauraha...I began feeling nervous...Now what? Where do I get those 20 bucks from?What if this fellow cuts off my hands and leaves me there to beg???Oh..Why didn't I call up papa at his factory..or my neighbour aunty..or why didn't I tell my teachers,my seniors!! :( Tears rolled down my cheek..and in a meek voice I said to the rickshaw wala "Side mein rokna..." There was a tempo standing there which I had to board next...I said to that tempo driver "Uncle,can you please give 20 Rs. to this rickshaw wala? I will pay you ahead..when I reach home..You will take me to gumti no? The tempo wala..a generous sardar..muttered some words..even that rickshaw wala did...and the first payment settled there..Whoosh!!!! I was going to gumti now...half the distance covered..The gumti tempos hault at the govind nagar tempo stand..from here I had to take a tempo to govind nagar and I owed the tempo driver 20+5+5 = 30 bucks...Now will the next tempo wala be so good?I wondered..that dumb harshita was annoying me now...Why the hell did I carry her along???Well, I again gathered courage..found a tempo to govind nagar and the driver was an old fella.."Dadaji..I don't have money." "So??". "Can you pay this sardar ji uncle 30 Rs.? I will give it to you at govind nagar..please dadaji..my mom is waiting at home for me :(" That's fair enough I guess to melt an old man....He took out the money from his pocket..and I heard them say "Kaise bacche hain..huh"...I was least bothered...I got a place to sit in the govind nagar wala tempo...I was heading towards home...I calculated..30+3+3 = 36 Rs......Should I throw this dumb kid out??Expresionless thingy..no better than the bag I was carrying on my back!! People have faces which resemble some or the other geometrical shape..square,round oval...but hers was a biiig question mark.....Uff!!
Govind Nagar!!!"Yes child...you gotta gimme 36 bucks..You will give it or shall I take you to the police?" My God!!!!!!! Now what????I told him dadaji,my house is in Barra-2, I need to hire a rickshaw from here to home...a rickshaw wala came there..he and that tempo wala dadaji were friends I guess..he called him by some name..he took 36 Rs. from him which the rickshaw man gave readily..and that old dadaji told him "Take these children to their home..and if they again start a story,take them to the police".. :(
He was so fond of the police!! yukks...bad dadaji...my grandpa is soooooo good..Well that rickshaw wala continuously kept cursing me and threatening me..but I was not that worried now..coz I knew I was not a fraud..I was going home..and I was so late...poor mom!! She must be so worried..There I could see Home.....with grandpa,granny and mom waiting at the gate for me...They were so puzzled!!Questions fired......"Where is your bus?Why this rickshaw?Where did you get down?Did you have money?" I assured them that I would explain everything..first pay off this fella...Mom went in and brought her purse..and when I told her that this guy needs to be paid 36+5 = 41 Rs.. everyone was shocked!! Why so much?? Where are you coming from? Are you all right? Eeeeeeeeee...Are they quiz masters or what...or am I in the rapid fire round...?I told them I will explain every detail...Just then.....guess what????????
That little dumb question mark who was with me as the heaviest burden I knew..fleed towards the confectionary shop!!! She took out a 50 Rs note from her bag and asked for chocolate and chips and what not!!! Damn it!!!! She had money!!!! and she was silent throughout the way...I felt like killing her...but I stopped..her grandpa would feel bad naa?" :)
My heart goes back to somewhere around 1995...I will narrate to you a small incidence of my life.I was a student of the seventh standard at that time.I studied in St. Mary's Convent Kanpur.One fine day,it was declared in school that the buses won't be running today...some strike due to diesel rates increase and all!!(Yeah...it always happens..and general public suffers.. :)). Now,my school was some good distance away from home.It used to take me approximately an hour and a half by bus to reach school...No mobile phones in those days..No landline even at my place..and yeah, I was not a pocket money kid ;)Now the question was..How do I reach home? School ended at 1:30 pm...We all rushed out of the gates..I was an extreme introvert kind of a child..As of now, I think I should have consulted my bus mates as to how were they planning to go..and I should have joined them...But no...something extra ordinary had to happen that day..
I moved on..and yes..I should not forget to mention,I took along a class one kid with me as well..why?? Just beccause her grandpa and my grandpa were good friends..What would his grandpa think of me no...if I left that kid alone..So...no money..an extra person along..nervous..frightened I moved on..........
I knew the way home..and the means of transport required as well..School to Bada Chauraha via rickshaw..20 bucks..bada chauraha to gumti by shared tempo..5 bucks..gumti to govind nagar by tempo again...3 bucks..govind nagar to home by rickshaw...5 bucks..Hmmm...so it comes to 33 bucks..and yes,don't forget to double the sum for that grandpa's grand daughter I was carrying along!! Morals do crush your common sense at times!! It often happens with me.."How will he/she feel?" "Why should I hurt him/her?" These thoughts are like parachutes..they open up when you are in the air heading towards nowhere...
Well...back to 1995...I hired a rickshaw.."Bhaia...bada chauraha chalenge?" "Haan chalenge..bees rupaya lagega"...Confidently I boarded along with my bag,water bottle and Harshita..yes..that was her name...As we reached bada chauraha...I began feeling nervous...Now what? Where do I get those 20 bucks from?What if this fellow cuts off my hands and leaves me there to beg???Oh..Why didn't I call up papa at his factory..or my neighbour aunty..or why didn't I tell my teachers,my seniors!! :( Tears rolled down my cheek..and in a meek voice I said to the rickshaw wala "Side mein rokna..." There was a tempo standing there which I had to board next...I said to that tempo driver "Uncle,can you please give 20 Rs. to this rickshaw wala? I will pay you ahead..when I reach home..You will take me to gumti no? The tempo wala..a generous sardar..muttered some words..even that rickshaw wala did...and the first payment settled there..Whoosh!!!! I was going to gumti now...half the distance covered..The gumti tempos hault at the govind nagar tempo stand..from here I had to take a tempo to govind nagar and I owed the tempo driver 20+5+5 = 30 bucks...Now will the next tempo wala be so good?I wondered..that dumb harshita was annoying me now...Why the hell did I carry her along???Well, I again gathered courage..found a tempo to govind nagar and the driver was an old fella.."Dadaji..I don't have money." "So??". "Can you pay this sardar ji uncle 30 Rs.? I will give it to you at govind nagar..please dadaji..my mom is waiting at home for me :(" That's fair enough I guess to melt an old man....He took out the money from his pocket..and I heard them say "Kaise bacche hain..huh"...I was least bothered...I got a place to sit in the govind nagar wala tempo...I was heading towards home...I calculated..30+3+3 = 36 Rs......Should I throw this dumb kid out??Expresionless thingy..no better than the bag I was carrying on my back!! People have faces which resemble some or the other geometrical shape..square,round oval...but hers was a biiig question mark.....Uff!!
Govind Nagar!!!"Yes child...you gotta gimme 36 bucks..You will give it or shall I take you to the police?" My God!!!!!!! Now what????I told him dadaji,my house is in Barra-2, I need to hire a rickshaw from here to home...a rickshaw wala came there..he and that tempo wala dadaji were friends I guess..he called him by some name..he took 36 Rs. from him which the rickshaw man gave readily..and that old dadaji told him "Take these children to their home..and if they again start a story,take them to the police".. :(
He was so fond of the police!! yukks...bad dadaji...my grandpa is soooooo good..Well that rickshaw wala continuously kept cursing me and threatening me..but I was not that worried now..coz I knew I was not a fraud..I was going home..and I was so late...poor mom!! She must be so worried..There I could see Home.....with grandpa,granny and mom waiting at the gate for me...They were so puzzled!!Questions fired......"Where is your bus?Why this rickshaw?Where did you get down?Did you have money?" I assured them that I would explain everything..first pay off this fella...Mom went in and brought her purse..and when I told her that this guy needs to be paid 36+5 = 41 Rs.. everyone was shocked!! Why so much?? Where are you coming from? Are you all right? Eeeeeeeeee...Are they quiz masters or what...or am I in the rapid fire round...?I told them I will explain every detail...Just then.....guess what????????
That little dumb question mark who was with me as the heaviest burden I knew..fleed towards the confectionary shop!!! She took out a 50 Rs note from her bag and asked for chocolate and chips and what not!!! Damn it!!!! She had money!!!! and she was silent throughout the way...I felt like killing her...but I stopped..her grandpa would feel bad naa?" :)
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
I begin writing.......
Hello...
Those of you knowing me,must be aware that I love to write... till yesterday I wrote on paper...today,having no work around...I thought of creating a blog....I googled about it "How to create a blog" and here I go.... Trust me friends... whenever you feel low or depressed or even joyous or overwhelmed, when you are feeling some bizzare kind of a feeling...when you don't have anyone to share with...just start writing... you might not be a very good writer or a poet....but,if you have feelings...just don't keep them botled in your heart....write them down...may be even jot them down in points....I don't say that write for the entire world to see what you wrote...write for your own self...whatever you feel like...just let your feelings flow.................
Those of you knowing me,must be aware that I love to write... till yesterday I wrote on paper...today,having no work around...I thought of creating a blog....I googled about it "How to create a blog" and here I go.... Trust me friends... whenever you feel low or depressed or even joyous or overwhelmed, when you are feeling some bizzare kind of a feeling...when you don't have anyone to share with...just start writing... you might not be a very good writer or a poet....but,if you have feelings...just don't keep them botled in your heart....write them down...may be even jot them down in points....I don't say that write for the entire world to see what you wrote...write for your own self...whatever you feel like...just let your feelings flow.................
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